You just absolutely killed your workout and catch a glimpse of yourself in the mirror lookin' gooood. You've kept on track with your healthy eating, said "no" to junk food, and your gym sessions have been consistent. The next day at the gym you see a girl walk in who's got it all. I'm talkin' Carrie Underwood legs, toned Jennifer Aniston arms, and you can nearly see her abs popping through her shirt. Throughout your 3 mile run on the treadmill you see her do the elliptical for 10 minutes, a quick arm circuit, couple planks, and she's out of the gym before you've even moved on to the weights. All of the sudden all of the hard work you have put in the past few weeks is beginning to feel worthless. Why can she have it all with that workout while you're busting your ass day in and day out for something that doesn't even seem to compare? We have all been there, and we all know it is not a good feeling, to say the least.
As you all know, "comparison is a thief of joy" doesn't just apply to our bodies, but it also applies to our job performances, grades, bank accounts, families, etc. Just when we think to ourselves that we have it all, someone has more. I remember during my undergrad I would get an exam grade back and feel a sense of pride that all of my hard work had paid off. I'd then look around and see that everyone had at least 5% higher and the joy was immediately sucked out of me. Guess how that grade difference has effected me today? It hasn't. At all. I still got into the school I wanted to get into, I'm still living in the city I've always wanted to live, and I'm still living my best life.
Jealousy is a natural emotion but also a nasty trait. Take for example social media- the highlight reel of everyone's life. I'm going to tell you something that you probably already know, but a lottttt of the girls who post flexed mirror shots with their tight tummies and cellulite-free thighs don't look like that in real life. And that's why I'm loving the "flexed vs unflexed" side-by-sides fitness models are posting now because it shows that most pictures are posted when girls are flexing so hard they can hardly breathe, which just isn't natural.
So how can we work on being a little less jealous and a little more grateful?
Gratitude. Gratitude for the body, life, family, and friends we've been given.
Gratitude allows us to focus on what we do have instead of what we don't have, and that makes it hard to be jealous of the girl with the rockin' bod and long silky hair. When you become grateful for what you have, it causes you to be compassionate and offer more to others because you're set, you're chillin'. You have what you need and now it's time to offer some of that to others. And when we're grateful, we worry less and less about getting the perfect "insta-worthy" beach pic that will hopefully reach 400 likes. It took me longer than it should to not let comparisons take over my life and I'd be sitting here lying to you if I said I still don't do it on a daily basis- again, we are human. But I realized I was envying people's highlight reels, not their real lives.
Everybody has their flaws, some just hide it better than others. Maybe that girl at the gym has a condition that makes it hard for her to put on weight and as much as she wants to bulk up a little bit, she just can't. Or maybe even more unfortunate for her, she has an eating disorder and mentally just can't shake it. I'm not saying that when someone seems to have it all that something must be wrong, because sometimes people just simply have it all, just not in all departments of life. Nobody's life is perfect, but the happiest people are those who take what they have and create their own definition of perfect. For me, it would be physically and mentally impossible to attain my absolute dream body with where I'm at in my life right now. Do I know how to? Yes- but I choose to put my happiness first, and happiness for me as a 22 year old is drinking margs with my friends on the weekends, never feeling hungry, and eating foods that taste good, but also make me feel good.
So who knows, maybe you could look like the girl at the gym who has it all? They say "the grass is always greener on the other side", so be happy with who you are and that will truly shine through,
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& a very special s/o to my person, Marnie Grow, for the insight on this post 😊